We Look Out For Each Other, ‘Cause We’ve Got Strength In Our Numbers
- Beca
- Jun 11
- 3 min read
(Frank Turner, “The Gathering”)
June is a complicated month. It’s Pride! For myself and many many others in the queer community, is a time of both celebration and reflection. We’re gloriously alive in a world that doesn’t necessarily want us! Let’s party!! But we also can’t forget that Pride started as a commemoration of a riot. On June 28, 1969, police raided the Stonewall Inn in Greenwich Village, NYC. At the time homosexuality was a crime, and police raided gay bars all the time—often being paid to do so. But this night, the 28th of June, the people there had had enough. Patrons and onlookers began shouting back and throwing things at the police. Instead of a normal raid, the protests spread into an uprising that lasted six days. And although the first Pride event took place to commemorate that uprising in 1970, it would take another 30 years for Pride to be officially recognized (by then-President Bill Clinton in 1999). In those 30 years, the LGBTQIA2+ community has survived the AIDS epidemic and numerous attempts to re-criminalize the way we exist and the way we love. Today, Trans people are under attack from some of the most powerful voices in the world. This fight is not over, and it is critical that those of us in the community with more privilege (white, cis, male, straight-passing, etc) use our voices to empower and protect the most marginalized among us.
June is also Men’s Mental Health Awareness Month (and PTSD awareness month). I actually didn’t know that until just this year. When we look at the statistics, it’s clear why this is so important. According to Mental Health America:
Though men account for about 10% of patients with bulimia or anorexia, men with an eating disorder are less likely to seek professional help.
Over 6 million men suffer from depression per year, but male depression often goes underdiagnosed.
More than 3 million men in the US have panic disorder, agoraphobia, or any other phobia.
Men also are four times more likely to complete suicide than women (although women are more likely to attempt suicide—this difference is often down to methodology). Men are 2-3 times more likely to experience substance abuse disorder than women, and experience a higher rate of alcohol related deaths. Men often present with irritability when depressed, which can cause them to be told to “calm down” instead of seek help. Young men experience more social isolation than any other group, which can be both a cause and symptom of depression.
These statistics are sobering. I have a 10 year old son who has been treated for anxiety for years. His anxiety expresses as explosive anger. I only knew what I was seeing because I also live with anxiety that sometimes expresses as explosive anger (yayyyy genetics). But I wonder how many boys out there are being treated like they are “bad kids”, instead of being given access to the tools that will help them cope with anxiety, depression, or any other mental health challenges that they may face. I think about how many men are angry and irritated, pouring their fourth whiskey while their family avoids them, with no one telling them “you aren’t broken, you just need help”.
So what can we do? Well, we are a community, so the most important thing is to show up for each other. Look after each other. If someone you know is struggling, if there’s a man in your life who seems to be turning to drugs and alcohol more, who seems angrier than usual, reach out. Talk to him. LISTEN to him. Remind him help is available and there is no shame in asking for it.
Our community also needs to step up and support our LGBTQIA+ members, especially young people. The statistics on the mental health of LGBTQIA+ young people show that they are contemplating suicide at an astonishing rate (almost 40%), but that a supportive community drops this by HALF. (Data from https://www.thetrevorproject.org/survey-2024/)
I always say that our strength lies in our community, and I stand by that. PRSL takes mental health seriously, and we are here to talk to, to help, to provide support. I myself had a difficult situation at a show last week (this blog was almost called “Panic! At the punk show”) and PRSL was there, just letting me be, letting me know I was safe and not alone (to the PRSL Cleveland folks: I love you!). If you are struggling, please know you are not alone. You are loved, and you are important. Reach out to me, to us—we’ll help however we can. Lean into community, because in the end, we’re all we’ve got. Happy Pride, Happy Summer; I’ll see you soon.
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